heal me (i'm a monster)
by psychrollins
Summary: "You saved us, took us into your home and cared for us when no one else would. You're not a bad man Romie, and you never will be. Whatever you do, it doesn't matter to us as long as you come home to us, where you belong."


**A/N:** **Another installment seeing as I gave myself the day off from studying for my exams. Warnings for violence and explicit themes. I promise we'll get back to an actual story line soon. Title taken from AWIM's Kill Me I'm a Monster. Come find me on tumblr!: psychrollins. Hope you enjoy!**

 **Translation for this chapter:**  
 **Lo'u alofa: My love**  
 **Lelei agelu: good/perfect angel.**

/

If you asked Roman what love was before Dean and Seth, he would probably have said that it's something like warmth, homeliness, stability. It's a lot of things that Roman thought he would never get, because of the nature of the life he leads. But that's exactly what Roman feels, sees, hears and breathes whenever he gets home, into his - _their_ \- bedroom, what nestles itself into his ribcage when he gets in late and his boys are curled up in bed and waiting for him to slip in between them.

But now if you asked Roman what love is, now that he's got Dean and Seth, he'll say that it's all of those things, the warmth, the stability and the feeling of _home,_ but he'll also say that it's standing in front of the mirror at six in the morning, shaving, while his boyfriends - and God that sounds so _good_ \- sit in the bathtub and clean themselves up while trying to convince him that the Empire can take care of itself.

"What more could you want than me and Seth all naked and at your mercy all day long?" Despite being able to see Dean's reflection in the mirror, Roman turns to face him, effortlessly gliding the razor down his throat with his boys eyes trained on him like they're starving dogs ready to devour him. It's a look Roman has seen more often than not, now that they've had a month or two to work out the dynamics of their relationship.

"Nothing, baby, but if I gave in to what I wanted every day then we wouldn't have a roof over our head. And if we didn't have a roof over our head," Roman sweeps the razor over the final strip of shaving cream before leaning down on his hunches and resting his arms on the bath tub, "Then we wouldn't have a bed in which I could enjoy you and Seth naked and completely at my mercy, would we?"

Pouting, Dean lets out a melodramatic sigh and Seth giggles - and it's quickly become one of Roman's favourite sounds, much like the way Dean's exaggerated pout makes Roman's chest swell with that _warmth_ \- "Fine." He mumbles and Roman tucks a hand under his chin, tilting his head up so that he can kiss the pout off his pretty face.

When he pulls away, Seth is gazing at them both with lust clouded eyes and he's worrying his lip between his teeth, most likely to keep himself quiet. Heat immediately pools in Roman's stomach. The effect that his boys have on him is overwhelming, the first blowjob they'd given given him was a catalyst for things to come and Roman found out pretty quickly that he was a slave to them. That he couldn't keep himself away from them, his hands off them, no matter how much he told himself in his head that he should just _look after them,_ like he does Xavier and the boys.

But Seth's words had stuck with him. He _could_ look after them while looking after them in other ways too. And that was all he really needed, to let himself go and to open his heart completely to the two of them. Roman's thumb tugs Seth's lip away from his teeth and kisses him too, lavishes him with just as much attention as he did Dean.

"I'll be back before dinner, tonight isn't one of those nights." And by that he means it's not a death night. Not the night that he has to put a bullet through a man's chest, one where he's out all night waiting for the target, buttering him up until he's putty in his hand and Roman can just easily end his existence. Being out till all hours of the morning never used to bother Roman - and he tries not to let it bother him now, because his relationship status doesn't change things - but now with Dean and Seth, he does think about them all tucked up in bed waiting for him, when before he didn't have anyone to go home to, so he never cared.

They both grin at him. It's been a long week. Full of days where Roman's been home little and out often and has only spent time with his boys in the twilight period when the sun rises and he's just slipping into the bed, eyes heavy and skin begging for the warmth of his lovers.

He could never have anticipated how well Seth and Dean would adapt to his lifestyle. To the things he does. What he's done. They never talk about it. They don't ask how many people died by his hands when he slips between them at four in the morning, they just press their clean lips against his skin, take their clean hands and wash them upon him and perhaps dry erase the blood that stains his body and his soul.

He raises himself from his hunches and swills his face in the sink. The splashing of water as he's patting himself dry gets his attention. Looking up in the mirror Roman can see Dean and Seth towelling themselves dry, the fluffy white towel gliding over the expanses of skin that Roman wishes his hands were. They still have the scars, despite months that have passed since he found them. Dean's are the worst, jagged and deep, some red and fresh while others have sunk into his skin like they've been sitting there for years. Seth's are less brutal, not so harsh on the eyes, but there nonetheless. He doesn't have as many as Dean and they're mostly bite marks, littered all across his beautiful body from neck to thigh.

But even with them, Roman doesn't see them as anything other than the most breathtaking creatures ever to have been put on this earth. The two slip back into the bedroom totally naked - and Roman loves that now he can stare at them shamelessly without feeling like he's crossing the line and being perverted - and slowly dress themselves. He takes his time finishing in the bathroom, slicks back his hair, puts on aftershave and slips on his shirt, because he knows that if he joins Dean and Seth in the bedroom while they dress he won't be able to keep his hands to himself.

When he's all buttoned up and tucked in, he has to step into the bedroom to get the last of his clothes, his tie, shoes and jacket. He's met with the scene of Seth pinning Dean down on the bed and attacking his mouth with furious kisses. There's a whimper stuck in Roman's throat, his dick stirring in his slacks.

"Sethhh," Roman drawls, trying to sound like he's chastising him, but it comes out something alike a groan. Seth stops kissing Dean to look up and grin at Roman cheekily, showing off his pretty pink and kiss swollen lips. It's clear what Seth is doing. Dean's talk in the bathroom hadn't worked, so now Seth is trying to play dirty because he knows that Roman's biggest weakness is the two of them together.

Dean all but whimpers underneath Seth, "He jumped me, Romie."

And now Dean is playing the victim, like it's the worst thing in the world to have Seth on top of him and kissing him breathless. He pads over to the bed while fixing his tie. A look of excitement quickly flashes through his boys' eyes until they realise that he's doing his tie _up_ and not pulling it off like they want him to.

Roman crooks a finger, beckoning them. Seth and Dean kneel on the bed in front of him and stare at him with the best puppy dog eyes they can manage. It makes Roman briefly consider telling his business meeting to fuck itself, because the eyes _always_ get to him, but he has business that needs to be attended to and he really doesn't need to start slacking. No matter how much he wants too. He pulls them in for a kiss, hands curling around the backs of their necks as they tuck their fingers into his belt loops to pull him closer.

There's still no real process to kissing them both without it being a hot mess of lips, teeth and tongue but Roman doesn't mind because he loves it. Has become addicted to the taste of _Dean and Seth_ mixing together. Seth's fingers creep close to his belt buckle and he has to pull his hips away to stop him from undoing it. Roman knows that if he let that happen he wouldn't be able to leave.

"Lo'u alofa, I'll be home soon, then I'll take care of you." He kisses them both on the forehead and squeezes the backs of their necks, thanking God for allowing him to have them.

Roman heads out, leaving the bedroom to the sounds of Dean and Seth bickering about how they were going to have to get better at seducing their man. He shakes his head fondly as he trundles down the stairs. They don't need to know that he was so close to cracking, because he'll enjoy witnessing any new crazy scheme they think up to get him to stay in bed with them all day.

The morning passes slowly, filled with nonsensical calls with potential clients, quick check ins with existing ones, and finally, the business meeting that will hopefully finally get rid of the last piece of property that belonged to the Ascension.

It had taken some shifting the last plot. Kevin and Sami's restaurant venture was starting to take off and some of the surrounding plots had been developed, but the littlest one on the end was proving hard to shift. He'd offered it to Brie and Daniel, but Brie had immediately shut it down when word had gotten around about the condition that Roman had found Dean and Seth in. Brie wanted no house that belonged to men like that and quite honestly, Roman didn't blame her.

The meeting doesn't go well. He hadn't perceived it to be dangerous, and neither had Jimmy, and so they'd made Jey stay home to sort through statements and invoices because he's _good_ at that shit. But the guy - some nameless, giant of a man who thinks that just because he's bigger than Roman that he's _better_ than Roman - tells him that he doesn't want to pay the asking price, wants to pay half of it and that's his final offer. Roman doesn't mind negotiating with people, he actually quite enjoys it, but this guy was taking him for a fool and he could see that. So he'd scoffed and told him that he'd find someone else to settle with.

He hadn't got a second to defend himself when the bruisers huge fist smashed into his face. He felt the brass knuckles that he hadn't seen slice right into the skin of his eyebrow, felt the blood rushing down his face and his brain rattle around in his skull. The room erupted into chaos immediately, Jimmy going straight for the guys kronie, restraining him while Roman had clutched desperately at his face.

The guy had had the audacity to laugh at him, like thought that one measly punch was going to The Empire's unbecoming. Roman had laughed right along with him, confusing the guy, who can't believe that Roman's not passed out on the floor.

There was a gun in his holster but he didn't use it. Just beat the man to death using his own two hands. With blood gushing down his face, dripping down onto the man below him, Roman had growled ferociously about just _who_ he was dealing with.

"I'm the man around here, and pathetic lowlifes like you with your shitty brass knuckles aren't going to change that." He had spat into his face while delivering the final blows, the weapon wrapped around his own knuckles. The guy was a bloody, disgusting mess by the time he was dead. Face bright red with blood, swollen and bulging with broken skin and smashed teeth hanging loosely from him.

His buddy had seen it all, so Jimmy choked him out and then placed the call to Xavier.

In the car, with Jimmy now driving because Roman's knuckles are busted to hell, Roman looks at his face in the overhead mirror. He's covered in blood, mostly his own but some not. His white shirt is soaked crimson, the large stain reaching just to top of his pecs but continuing to grow as more and more blood seeps from the gash above Roman's eye. He's going to need stitches, that much is clear. Roman uses his tie to wipe away some of the blood that's trickling into his eye. At least it's not his favourite tie. He hasn't looked like this in a while, people had learnt that Roman Reigns is not a man you mess with, not a man you try and pick a fight with because you will _never_ win.

It's just gone five in the afternoon when Jimmy pulls the car into the garage and Roman has just about managed to subdue his bleeding, keeping the tie he'd pulled off pressed firmly against the gash.

"I'll get Naomi, you're gonna need some stitches in that thing." Jimmy winces as Roman removes the tie and a fresh wave of blood pulses from the wound. He lets his cousin go off into the house to find his wife and makes his way into the kitchen to get water. All Roman can taste is the metallic tang of his own blood and it's making him feel sick.

"Roman!" A terrified voice calls and before he can even look up, there's a body attached to him and squeezing him for all the air in his lungs. Seth. He puts his arms around his boyfriend and tries to soothe him, runs a hand through his hair even though it's covered in drying blood and hurts like a bitch.

"I'm okay baby, just a scratch." Looking up, Seth gawks at him and opens his mouth to respond but Dean running into the kitchen and mimicking the exact thing Seth did cuts him off. They're both holding onto him for dear life and Roman realises that they've never seen him like this, never seen him busted open and covered in his _own_ blood. And he'd promised them that tonight wasn't a death night, that he only had business meetings, it's not hard understand why they're so shook up at the sight of him.

Without many words, Dean gently takes his wrist, being mindful of his swollen hands, and pulls him up the stairs. He takes the medical kit from Naomi when they pass her on the stairs and carries onto their bedroom without saying anything.

Roman ends up stripped of his bloody shirt and blazer and laid down on the bed. Dean sits on one side of him cleaning his face with warm water from the bathroom while a needle is sterilising in a cup. Seth sits on his other side, doing the same with his busted knuckles. With the blood gone from them he can see just much damage he's done, fortunately they're not broken but they are bruised and swollen, skin raw and split. Both injuries are painful, but his boys loving hands do much in the way of soothing him.

He doesn't ask how Dean knows how to stitch up a wound, but he _does_ get asked what happened.

Roman doesn't answer immediately, just hesitates because how does he tell them that he beat a man to death because he laughed at him, let another man die just because he saw the whole thing, how does he tell them that he'd felt fucking _high_ when the man beneath him had taken his final blood soaked breath?

But his boys are looking at him curiously and he can't lie to them. "The guy who offered to buy my plot of land tried to make a fool out of me, sucker punched me with a knuckle duster while laughing."

Unexpectedly, Seth grins excitedly, "So you killed him?"

Roman casts his eyes down - and gets scolded by Dean and told to _quit moving_ \- shamefully, "I beat him to death." He says while Seth runs a finger in between his swollen knuckles.

"Good." Seth says it so simply that Roman flinches and Dean scolds him _again_ for moving.

"Rome if you don't stop moving I'm going to stab you." He shuts up then, let's Dean finish his handiwork and put all the stuff on the bedside table to return to Naomi later on. Seth and Dean flank him immediately, latching onto him either side and peppering his face and jaw with kisses while their hands roam the expanse of his bare chest.

As good as it feels, Roman can't help but wonder how they can still want him. They had never come across his most vicious side while being here, the killing of The Ascension was so a _good_ reason, it was _justified._ The killing of a potential business partner was not.

"I'm not a good guy." He manages to say in a weak voice. His boys stop what they're doing immediately, let a heartbeat pass before going right back at it, Dean nibbling at his jaw while Seth sucks marks into the soft flesh underneath his ear.

"You're not a bad guy either, Romie." Dean says into his skin, punctuates his words with a gentle pinch to his exposed side.

"You're _our_ guy," Seth says quietly into his ear and his hot breath makes Roman shiver.

"We don't care what you do. Who you hurt. You don't scare us." Seth continues, looking at him those beautiful now. There's no fear in them, only adoration.

"I should."

"Every dog has their snapping points, even big, silly puppies like you." Dean is grinning at him all goofy and soft and Roman's a little bit lost for words. They're not scared of him, they don't see him as some cold blooded killer who's going to hurt them. The two crawl onto him even more so that they're each straddling a leg and looking down on him.

"What kinda' puppy would you say he is, Deano?" Roman's fears and worries start to seep away while he's under their innocent gaze. Dean considers him, cocking his head to the side before flashing a toothy smile.

"One of those big ones, you know, they slobber and drool all the time. One was in that movie and it got a toilet seat stuck round his head?"

Seth let's out one of his little nasally, adorable laughs. "Beethoven? Yeah, Rome is definitely a St. Bernard. All big and fluffy and beautiful." Roman can't help but laugh along with them and their idiocy. His laughing ceases however, when both Dean and Seth get a hand on his crotch and grin evilly at him.

"Mhm, I mean, he _does_ drool a lot when he sees us naked." They increase the pressure, rubbing and squeezing his rapidly hardening cock through his slacks.

Roman sucks in a harsh breath, hands flying to each of their waists as they gently begin to rock back and forth on his legs. All previous thoughts are gone, replaced only by _want_ and _need._

"Kinda hard not too."

Dean moans quietly, eyes fluttering shut as he humps Roman's leg with more pace, losing his rhythm with Seth as well as his composure. Roman's about a second and a half away from flipping them all over and _doing something_ about the two cock teases in his lap when there's a loud knocking on the bedroom door and Kofi's loud voice sounding outside.

"Hey you three, wrap up whatever you got going on in there now and get your asses downstairs, dinner is almost ready," Kofi's voice gets further away before he adds: "And do _not_ make me come up here and knock again. Y'all got all night to fuck."

Roman lets out an irritated sigh as Dean and Seth dismount his legs like the obedient little angels they are. He's painfully hard in his slacks and Dean and Seth giggle at him as he stomps around the bedroom and changes into clothes that don't have blood on them and hide his obvious hard on.

Seth leans into his ear just before they leave the room and says: "Don't worry, you can have your way with us after dinner; show us what the big dogs really like when he gets going."

After dinner, Roman does just that. Spurred on by their earlier words and their teasing, Roman fucks them both into the mattress until they're screaming out for him. Then he takes them slowly, kisses every inch of them, tells them how beautiful they are and that they're his lelei agelu.

Later, after multiple orgasms and a long shower, Dean and Seth curl around him tightly in bed, tuck against him like they're the missing pieces of his jigsaw puzzle and he's finally complete.

Seth dozes off first, lulled to sleep by Roman smoothing his hands through his hands. Dean's almost there, eyes drooping and his breath slowing, but he has just enough consciousness to quietly say,

"You saved us, took us into your home and cared for us when no one else would. You're not a bad man Romie, and you never will be. Whatever you do, it doesn't matter to us as long as you come _home_ to us, where you _belong._ " Dean snores quietly before Roman has the chance to respond, but he lets the words sink into his skin. Home to _them._ Yeah, that sounds nice.


End file.
